But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
