Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Randomize
