he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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