Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
