I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
its not stalking. its research.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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