hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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