I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
