he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
