Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
