Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
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