is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
