sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
