Well apparently he's into motor boating.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
