jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Tell her she can't have a vagina
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize