I want to stick my p in your. b.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize