I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize