Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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