So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
