No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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