I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize