I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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