Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
