Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize