last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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