I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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