What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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