Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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