weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
