i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
