Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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