You can't special order awesome
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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