Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
