But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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