y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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