feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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