btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
