Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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