So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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