The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I need moral support for this bender
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Randomize
