His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
