I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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