...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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