I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
