video games are the ultimate cock blocker
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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