So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
