The maid of honor just puked.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
