I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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