I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
