hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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