Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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