i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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