It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
